MIND & BODY

Treat Yo’Self Girl: Prayer & Meditation

Sharice Bryant
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3 Mins read
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“If I asked you to name all of the things that you love, how long would it take you before you say yourself?”-Anonymous.”

Living in a society where we’re so accustomed to putting our wants/needs last, sometimes we can get so caught up in life, that we forget about the most important person: OURSELVES! We often put ourselves on the back burner so often, and without even a second thought, that one day you can literally sit back and try to think back to the last time you went out on a Saturday night with your friends, took a much needed vacation, ventured out and did an activity that YOU actually wanted to do just for the hell of it. Often times, if we don’t take care of ourselves mentally and physically, stress and just being overworked and straight up tired can have its negative effects on us.

“So the question is, how do I maintain a healthy lifestyle mentally and physically?

The answer is simple: TREAT YO’ SELF GIRL! ”

As a Black female trying to live her life to the fullest in the healthiest way, I want to help my fellow brown beauties out on how to lead the healthy lifestyle you deserve:

PRAYER

For my spiritual/religious brown beauties, praying is the first thing that honestly brings you inner peace. Literally giving it all to God or any higher power you believe in, and no longer worrying about it lifts the inner spirit so much that the next day when you wake up, you feel a sense of security and lightness in your soul that cannot be explained. My mother used to always tell me when I was younger, and still to this day, that if you pray about something and still worry about the problem at hand, then you’re not practicing real faith. Pray, let it go, and go to bed.

MEDITATION

I know what you’re thinking when you see the word “mediate”: The scene in What’s Love Got To Do With It, when Tina Turner was chanting “Namu Myoho Renge Kyo”. Although that chant is a Buddhist mantra chant, which is good for universal cause and effect, there are other outlets on how to meditate. Meditating is a fantastic way to train the mind to be still, be positive and relax.

Outdoor meditating is always a great release. You’re in tune with nature, your mind and all the sounds of the environment make for a fantastic soundtrack to accompany you in letting go of all the chaos around you.

Many of us just need to relax and mediation brings the peace of mind that is often times slips from our grasps. There are many DVDs and books that are geared towards meditation that can be explored, in order to find out which method works best for you.

Prayer and meditate brown beauties! Treat yo’ self girl and stay beautiful!

TREAT YO’ SELF GIRL! A Black Girl Helping Black Girls is a series created by Sharice Bryant that highlights two outlets on how to treat yourself, starting with mental health, and leads into physical health.

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MIND & BODY

Strength For Your Body & Mind

4 Mins read
February 1, 2016

This past summer I took time to unplug and re-boot. Limited social media and blogging. I thought it would be difficult at first but it was so refreshing! I felt guilty for not posting enough and sometimes even lazy for taking a break to take care of myself. Why is it that we sometimes feel guilty for putting our health first ahead of projects and deadlines? Mental and physical health are so important to our everyday lives. Poor health in either area can have short and long lasting effects on your work, relationships, and self-esteem. Social media, society pressures and television can also have a negative impact on your subconscious and affect you in ways of which you’re not even aware. The shows you watch, the music you listen to…it all makes a difference. We’re so attached to our screens and perpetually stimulated often times not giving our minds time to rest or our bodies the fuel it needs. You absolutely have to take time to unplug. I want to share with you some of the takeaways from my own health re-boot and would love for you to share yours below! NUTRITIONI’ve never had a problem eating if you know what I’m sayin’… I love food…but when you’re super busy sometimes it’s easier to eat out or even worse, skip meals. I never really thought about the effects of “not having time for lunch” would have on me—if anything I thought I was saving calories! Obviously that’s stupid. Your body needs fuel, good fuel, spaced out throughout the day to keep you going and your energy levels high. I was ALWAYS tired, in part because of my schedule, but also because of my diet so the first step in my re-boot was to re-think the way I was eating. I started with the Arden’s Garden 2-Day Detox and followed up with a healthy eating plan and schedule. Meal prep, meal prep, meal prep! FITNESSI like to think I’m moderately active. I walk to work, go to the gym (when I feel like it) and try to make healthy choices. I ran my 3rd half marathon two weeks ago and was feeling pretty accomplished. Although I’m not completely inactive I felt I needed a change to my fitness routine. I can admit I don’t push myself that hard in the gym and I give myself a pass if I’m tired or don’t feel like working out one day. I needed someone to hold me accountable, push me outside of my comfort zone and get me the results I was looking for. Cue the personal trainer. Best and worst decision of my life. The worst (not really) because let’s face it, it’s hard as shit and I want to cry every session, but the best because I’m making a long term investment in my health. The best because I feel great and have so much more energy. The best because I’m learning how to push myself physically in ways I’ve never done before. And the best because I’m putting myself first. So worth the time, money and energy. MENTALSTEP AWAY FROM THE PHONE, COMPUTER, EVERYTHING! Take a deep breath and unplug.I attended a short talk yesterday titled “Surviving to Thriving” by Dr. Kristen Race, Ph.D. She shared awesome tips for stress-relief and mindfulness. She reminded us of the importance of building resilience against the inevitable stresses in daily life. There is always going to be something but the key is how you rebound and reboot. How you handle the stress can send you into a spiral of chronic stress, lasting hours, days or years, or keep you at your optimal brain functioning level allowing you to think clearly and logically. I want to share with you my favorite notes and takeaways from her talk in hopes it can make a difference for you too. | Mindfulness | Pay attention to the present moment with kindness. As we practice it gets easier, just like muscle memory. | Breathing + Meditation | Start with 5 minutes/day to disconnect, close your eyes and simply breath. Focus only on your breath and “wrestle your mind to the ground”. | Connection | Make time to visit friends and family instead of texting or calling. Low real-life social connection, eye contact, hugging, etc., is worse than smoking or high blood pressure. | Engrave the Good | How many times has someone given you constructive feedback, both positive and negative, but only the negative stuck with you? Naturally our minds are more sensitive to negative information with stresses enforcing those negative experiences. “Magical moments are easy to miss when you’re not paying attention.” This could be something as simple as an admirer gazing at how beautiful you are and you don’t even notice or how excited your dog is to see you when you get home. | Three Good Things | Recognize 3 good things from your day at the end of the day. 3 minutes for 14 days. Try it and see how you feel! | Embrace the Mistakes | Making mistakes is a part of your life journey. It’s inevitable. Show the same compassion to yourself for a mistake the same you would a friend. Keep it positive and don’t be so hard on yourself! | Kindness | Performing 1 act of kindness a day can improve mindfulness and boost serotonin. It benefits you just as much as the other person. | Tying it All Together | Play the “Rose, Bud, Thorn” game at the end of the day. Rose: A good experience. Thorn: A obstacle or mistake. Bud: An act of kindness. “THE BEST SUPPORT YOU CAN GIVE YOURSELF IS A CALM AND AWARE PRESENCE.” I hope this reaches someone who needs it! I’d love to hear your thoughts and experiences below! Well wishes and happy thinking!

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Culture + Lifestyle

3 Aspects in Finding Your Faith

6 Mins read
August 29, 2016

Hey beauties! I suggest you cue some Kirk Franklin, because it’s about to get spiritual UP IN HERE! The past two years for me have been quite a transition with so many areas in life. Jobs, figuring out what I want to do and how to go about doing such, relationships, friendships…the list just goes on. But one thing I’ve haven’t touched on that is a big part of my life journey is my faith and how I found. Many of us have or are currently struggling with finding faith (if interested at all in doing so), keeping it and living it.             Your belief in a higher being is always tested, so I’m not going to lie to you and say the journey is smooth and once you find your faith, that everything will go your way, because that is the furthest from the truth.             So how do we find our faith in order to live as faithful beings? It’s not as complicated or lengthy list as many believe. Allow me to present to you… THE 3 ASPECTS IN FINDING YOUR FAITH 1.     Forgive & Seek Forgiveness So you’ve had a revelation and have decided to get closer or even get to know God, fantastic girl! The long yet beneficial spiritual journey requires us to strip ourselves from the person we were before seeking God. Forgiveness is a major key in finding and living your faith. Often times when this subject comes up, we think of forgiving others for wronging us, even if we don’t receive an apology, which is true but have you forgave yourself yet? It took me some time to practice this aspect, and I’m still doing such to this day. Just like God forgives us for our trespasses, we must also forgive ourselves and stop condemning the person we left behind in the past. Your future has no room for guilt my dear. Yes, those that may have known and have even gotten used to the old you and your old habits will have a ball bringing up the things you’ve done, but it’s not your job to feed into that.             There were many things I’ve done in previous years that I sometimes still feel ashamed of, but what I had to do was tell myself whole heartedly that the choices I’ve made doesn’t equate to me not deserving a blessed and prosperous life. When we know we’ve done a bad thing, we beat ourselves up for a very long time and that stunts our growth. In order to receive the blessings that were intended for you, you have to first believe that you deserve them and forgive yourself of the things you may have done long ago, or even last week! Are we clear?  It’s also important to seek forgiveness as well. Seek forgiveness from others you may have wronged. Whether you get an acceptance or not, just know that you stepped forward with a sincere apology. If someone doesn’t forgive you, they’re only hurting themselves. And but of course, seek forgiveness from God. That’s the easiest part because before you even confess, you are forgiven. However, what has worked for me was verbally asking for forgiveness, actually changing my behavior and praying for the strength to continue to forgive myself, forgive others and seek forgiveness when necessary. It might work for you too 😉 “He has delivered us from the domain of darkness and transferred us to the kingdom of his beloved Son, in whom we have redemption, the forgiveness of sins.”- Colossians 1:13-14 2.     Detox Your Life (a.k.a shake the devil off) The devil is a lie chile. Anything or anyone that serves as a threat to keep you from your spiritual goals and blessings is toxic and you must detox your life from all the mess that isn’t helping you in the long run.             I’m sure we’ve all heard of or have tried those popular detox fitness teas, or have even done a homemade juice cleanse. When someone drinks those teas, or juices for a certain amount of time, the body begins to rid all of the bad stuff. This process usually results in frequent trips to the bathroom due to the fact that the ingredients being taken in are quickly ridding the toxic within. Detoxing your life operates the exact same way.             First things first, identify what or whom exactly it is that is not serving your spiritual life positively. Every problem needs to be identified then eliminated. For some, excess drinking of alcohol can be a catalyst for toxic behavior ending in horrible consequences.  For others, it could be their anger, judging others, putting up with people that don’t have their best interest at heart, self-doubt, smoking, high-risk sexual encounters, etc. Just know that there’s a reason for that feeling deep down inside tugging at you whenever you’re about to do or have finished doing whatever activity is holding you back from growing within your faith.             It’s so easy to do the wrong thing vs. the right thing. We live in times where we just love instant gratification and majority of the things that come easy and quickly are usually not all it’s crack up to be, go just as quick as it came and can leave you feeling empty every single time.             When you begin to find your faith, it’s impossible to still lead the life the way you did before. Once you fully accept God into your life, there is no way you’ll ever be the same again. Welcome the detox, embrace it and don’t be afraid to do what’s right for you during your journey to finding faith and living in it. “Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a steadfast spirit within me.” Psalm 51:10 3.     Trust Trusting is such a hard thing to do. And I’m going to keep it real with you when I say, during your journey, it’s going to be hard …

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Culture + Lifestyle

Treat Yo’Self Girl: 4 Mantles in Leading an Unapologetic Life

5 Mins read
August 11, 2016

Hey girl hey! This thing called life has its ups and its downs. We continue to go through many phases that shape us into the woman we are today and the beauty we will become later on down the road. With that being said, we\’ve been blessed with one life to live and it\’s vital for us to lead the life WE want, no matter what outside opinions may have to say. As women, we often put ourselves on the back burner for many reasons and for many people. Eventually, putting the most important person (that\’s you!) last has the potential to lead to many  issues, physically and mentally, such as high blood pressure, depression, insomnia, alcoholism, drug addiction, the list just goes on girl! Although we know that we should come first, we also do not know exactly how to go about living for ourselves. Let me be of service to you dear….let\’s get the list poppin\’! I present to you: THE 4 MANTLES IN LEADING AN UNAPOLOGETIC LIFE! 1. Validate Your Feelings \”Your feelings are valid\”. This is a common phrase my best friend for many years still tells me to this day. I have this issue that I\’ve been working on for a long time that has held me back in the past. I\’m someone that doesn\’t like confrontation. I have a bad habit of keeping my feelings bottled up in order to spare someone else\’s feelings when it comes to myfeelings. If you can relate, this is the most toxic thing you can do to yourself. If a friend, partner, family member or co-worker says or does something that REALLY makes you feel a certain way, let them know immediately. Do not overthink what his/her reaction will be once you let the issue be known, thus leading you to say to yourself \”forget it, it\’s stupid.\” WRONG! INCORRECT! GIRL HELL NO. No matter what you may feel about a certain issue at hand, don\’t convince yourself or let anyone make you feel as if your feelings are invalid. They are not. Although we choose how we react to different situations, we cannot control the way we feel. As soon as you let those emotions out, I assure you, you will feel much better. Keeping things bottled up is very unhealthy and can lead to moments where you finally let all that angst go when a minuscule problem happens. Then you\’re out here going ballistic and looking crazy because you never said something before. People are not mind readers and we often times think just because someone has known us for some time, that they should know what words/actions will press that emotional button, and that\’s not always true. Let it out girl.  Now,  if whomever you express your feelings to has an issue with you being a human being with real emotions causes another negative ordeal, that leads me to my next point…. 2. Stand Up For Yourself Disrespect coming from anyone is a no. There is no reason for anyone to disrespect you as a person for any reason. This point is very vital when it comes to being a woman. We often times are disrespected by our misogynistic male counterparts on a plethora of topics and although men should have it instilled in their minds to give respect to women, no matter how a woman dresses, carries herself, etc, unfortunately, some do not think that way and think it\’s okay to disregard our feelings when we feel disrespected. It\’s your job to stand up for yourself as a woman and as a human being. Like I said in the first mantle, if someone has an issue with you feeling some type of way about how THEY treated you, the next step is to stand firm behind those emotions and stand up for yourself. No matter what the outcome may be, when someone in your life disrespects you, male or female, DO. NOT. LET. IT. SLIDE. For your own good, stand up for yourself or your conscience will ride your back for quite some time. And if that person has an issue with you taking a stand, then do like Martin, open the door and kick em\’ out like Pam. Trust me, it\’s not as big of a loss as you may think. 3. Stop Apologizing Now, if you do something wrong, or offend someone, then you do need to apologize lol. What I\’m trying to say is, don\’t apologize for the way you lead your life, your feelings, your opinions, or who you are as a person just because others may feel uncomfortable. For a long time, I apologized to people for who I am, and that\’s considered insanity to me nowadays. I would even start my opinions with, \”Sorry, but…\” If you do the same thing, girl stop it. Have you ever noticed during a debate, a presidential one in particular, that candidates never start their views on certain topics with \”I\’m sorry but this is where I stand on…\”? No you have not. If we ever heard a potential president say \”sorry\” during a debate where he/she is supposed to stand FIRM in their beliefs, we would question their leadership. Would you vote for someone who apologizes a lot? I\’m someone that believes in old fashioned dating. Not sorry. I love basketball and football and always await each season as if Christmas is coming. Not sorry. I think purple is the best color in the world. Not sorry. I want to be well off in my career before I settle down. Not sorry. Some people may disagree with those points but guess what…I don\’t care. Don\’t let anyone try to force you into a box of how you should act, carry yourself or speak. You belong to you and you should never apologize for being you. 4. Do Whatever the F*ck You Want!  Too often, we hold ourselves back from doing what we really want to do in order to please others. Again, stop. Do …
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